Making the Most Out of Your Retreat

Hey writer and fellow creative friends. Wherever you are on your artistic journey, I hope you’ve considered the benefits of joining or participating in a retreat. Now, retreats can range from the ridiculously expensive, to renting a room at the shady looking motel three miles away. Some have classes or workshops, some have yoga or hiking mixed in, some are just straight up writing time.The point is to get out of your normal space, away from your normal routine, and spend that time focusing on your work. So whether you’ve broken the bank to jet set off to the French Riviera or you’re on your way to a twin room at the Motel 6, these tips can help you get the most out of that time. I even put it in a nifty little bullet list.

  • Be Prepared (Mentally):
    • One of the best tips I have, is to make yourself a list, before you go, detailing what you want to do, or get out of the retreat. Are you hoping to network and make connections? Are you aiming for a certain word count, or project completion? List out the major goals, then leave space (I’ll tell you why later on)
    • Be realistic but also a shade optimistic. Know your average, everyday word count and think about doubling or tripling it. You’ll have more time and less outward distractions and setting that goal will keep you on track. By making it a little challenging you’ll push yourself just enough. Even if you don’t hit the goal, you will get farther than if you’d been too ‘reasonable’.
    • Bring multiple or at least a couple different things to work on. The hours can become tedious and you might want to switch it up to stay fresh and motivated.
    • As a mom, and working mom, a strange thing happens the first few hours of being alone at a retreat. I get this thing I call “care-giver paralysis”. In the absence of doing for others, I can’t remember what to do with just myself. Understanding that this feeling will come, and I’ll have some listlessness helps me to remember to ease into the weekend with some journaling, or shorter projects.
  • Be Prepared (Physically):
    • The practical side of things is that you’re going to be away from home. But not on a typical vacation. So remember to bring your goal list, paper, pens, notebooks, journals, your laptop and charger…the basic tools of your trade. Make them your favorites or the one’s you’ve been ‘saving’ for something special. This is something special.
    • Plan for the environment: If you’re poolside or in the mountains, bring the proper clothing and footwear. You won’t be holed up in your room the whole time (I’ll explain more on that later). If there are dinners or classes, if it could be cold, or hot, try to think in layers. If its just writing, pack lots of comfortable clothing. Sunblock, hats and mittens. Bear spray or Mosquito spray?
    • Sleep aids- especially if sharing a room. I’m talking about eye covers, ear plugs, and headphones (not a rubber mallet if your roommate snores). Anything you need to get a good night’s rest.
    • Any special dietary needs/wants that the place won’t be able to provide.
    • Water bottle, medication, and bathroom necessities. Nothing is worse than being dehydrated and/or not having a toothbrush. Big and little comforts will make a huge difference.
    • Business cards. Holy shit, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve forgotten this one. Even if you’re just there to write, exchanging info with your fellow retreat members is great. You’ll be surprised how much you learn from one another in that time.
    • Tech that you need, none that you don’t. You’ll need brain breaks, you’ll probably want to check in with family once or twice, you may need a laptop. You probably don’t need your gaming system, and be careful of your social apps. This is a time for connecting with yourself and your art, not the 7 billion people of the world.
  • Be Flexible:
    • You’re going to have a goal list. You’re probably going to stray from it. That’s alright
    • There may be days when the word count fizzles or the scene doesn’t play out like you want. That’s okay.
    • There may be a project you exceed expectations on, and another you barely touch. That’s alright.
    • You may accidentally sleep in, or need a nap, or get caught up in conversations. These are good things.
    • Retreats are a balance of getting your work done, and taking care of yourself, which leads me to…
  • Schedule in Self-Care:
    • Bring along comfort. Your favorite pillow, blanket, clothing, music. Whatever it is that helps you feel relaxed and at home.
    • Take naps. You’re little brain is going to be working extra hard. It’s going to be focusing for hours and working through the plot holes and dialogues you’ve been avoiding. Schedule in time for naps, early bed times, or meditation on your goal list.
    • Take advantage of the outdoors. (Unless your Motel 6 is in a shady part of the city–then try to grab a Lyft to a safer part) Go for a hike or walk every couple of hours. Sit outside stare off into the far away for awhile. Your eyes and brain will thank you. Also schedule in brain breaks on your list.
    • Bring any nutritional or necessary snacks. I need coffee in the morning. I need tea before bed. I need fresh fruit and veg. I like hydration mix and the occasional bourbon on ice (not together, that would be gross) I want my Little Debbie brownies and my twizzlers. These little joys will keep your spirits up in the middle of the tough work.
    • Exercise, Mediate, Drink lots of Water, and take warm showers. All good things and breaks away from the intensity.
    • Skimping on self care will make you less productive and more likely to burn out. Nobody wants a mushy brain half way through.
  • Assess and Recalibrate:
    • After its all over, if you’ve got a drive home, or a flight…take some time to reflect. What went well? What was a challenge? What did you wish you had? What did you bring that you could have left home?
    • How did your goal list go? Did you overshoot? Did you get distracted, and by what?
    • How do you feel physically and mentally and how can you make sure that the next retreat leaves you feeling accomplished without being overwhlemed.

Well, there you go. I’m open to hearing if you have any other advice in the comments below. I’ll be heading a retreat next week, so if you’ll be there, I hope we can make it a great experience. If you can’t be there, I’ll be hosting another one in the fall with the Writing Heights Writers Association and I’ll let you know the details as they’re finalized. Until then, Happy Writing.

What’s Up This Month?

Wow, I’m so glad you asked. I’d love to say, I’ll be doing a lot of fall gardening, hiking to my heart’s content, writing in hoodies with hot tea and snuggling into the fall. Unfortunately, its still hot as balls here, and a writer’s work is never done. So none of that will transpire (though I may sneak away for a hike). Below are some links on where I’ll be, what I’ll be doing, and some cool books, events and classes I hope you’ll check out. Not to sound altruistic, but its not all about me here…

One of my favorite people in the whole world is releasing his first novel today (September 5th). William Missouri Downs is a delightful, ingenious writer. He’s been a play and screen writer for many years and this is his first foray into fiction. And let me tell you…its fucking brilliant. If you like humor, philosophy, and quick, fun, laugh-out-loud scenes, you won’t be disappointed. You can get your own copy of it here: 5 Minutes From Chaos

My first Youth Writer’s meeting happens on September 14th. The group meets once a month but in the next year we’ll be bringing in some stellar guest speakers and doing a lot more to help the members get writing time in and promote their work. If you know of a youth (12-18) who loves to write but who’s creativity is constantly being smooshed flat by diagraming sentences in English class, send them my way. Nothing but uneducated, free-wheeling writing going on here. It’s in person and virtual and FREE. Check it out here: Youth Writing WHWA

I’m taking my oldest daughter on a college visit to New York state. I don’t want to pressure her, but I’m really hoping she likes The University of New York Fredonia, because one of my bestest friends works there in the English department. I’ll actually get to see her while I’m in town, and this lady Rebecca Cuthbert, is a writer you should get to know. Her work is brilliant, dark, smart, delicious and spine tingling. I just love it. Her newest books and releases can be found here: Rebecca Cuthbert

I’ll be helping to host some of the events with Writing Heights Writer’s Association, so if you want more information on a great group that will help you better your writing skill and offer you a wonderful support system of other writers who really get it, check them out here: WHWA

Finally, I’ll be attending the Rocky Mountain Fiction Writer’s Colorado Gold Conference at the end of the month and I’m all atwitter over it. Nervoucited? Excitous? I’ll be teaching the classes shown below at the event and trying to cram going to as many more as I can. The presenters are amazing, the content offered is awesome and I’m just gearing up to writer-geek out. Here’s the link if you want to register, because I would LOVE to see you there: RMFW Gold Conference.

Well, that’s it (as though all of this isn’t going to run me ragged) I hope that you find something cool to do with the month and I hope I get to see you sometime. Take care!

Big News and…Less-Big News

Well, first there’s this…

If you don’t follow me on social media, the big news of the week is that “Raising Elle” was selected as a finalist for the Colorado Book Awards through The Colorado Humanities. The winners will be announced at the end of June. But until I lose (probable) I will crow about it wherever I can. Because I believe in the arts and this is a huge honor. Congratulations to my fellow finalists as well!

What else is in news? Well… I’ll be teaching at a sweet little mountain retreat in May. I believe there are still spots open and its going to be a great way to kick start your next project, or help you overcome the roadblocks you might be having. The Writers Retreat, sponsored by the Writing Heights Writer’s Association is May 6th through the 9th and will feature workshops as well as free-write time. Food and lodging is included, and its really a great deal. Don’t wait, because spots will fill up fast.

Whenever someone asks me how I finished my first novel, it was because I invested in the time to work on it. Time is what a retreat offers you, away from the demands of the day so you can throw your heart into your work. And that’s how books get written. Register HERE.

Hm…also…I will be teaching a few Saturday classes through the WHWA coming up. But even if its not me teaching them, you should attend. Every third Saturday, for a very small fee (free if you’re a member of WHWA-register here) you get two, one-hour classes on craft, business, and writing related topics.

If you have a youth interested in writing, this is a GREAT time to get them signed up for my youth classes (every 2nd Saturday from 1-3. Free, no charge, and fun) we’re working on putting together a book, and the young writers will be paid for their submissions. Check out that website here.

The yearly conference for WHWA is on July 19th-20th and will focus on the other aspects involved with writing, including goal setting for writers, contracts and dealing with copyrights in the era of AI, marketing, formatting, and building up your platform. It should be really helpful for those of you who are taking next steps in the process. You can Register Here and we can hang out after all the braining for a martini or a cup of tea.

In other, lesser news…I’m stalled out on my writing. I don’t know if its a combination of everything else happening in life (kids, pets, surgeries, existential dread, running injuries, feelings of inadequacy, lack of sleep, imposter syndrome, anxiety, depression…lack of fucks to give? disillusionment, loss of romanticism, loss of…will to create anything at all. I don’t even want to make a sandwich) but I’m struggling. I’m trying out playwriting… I’m failing. I think I’ve rewritten the current project (not even complete) four times over and I’m barely making headway… I don’t have a new book ready. I don’t even have any of my older projects done…my current Kindle Vella is…DOA, and I feel like I’m bereft of purpose. So….yeah. Happy week I guess? I keep telling myself it’ll come back. But the snide and growing voice in the back of my head keeps sneering…”what if it doesn’t?”

what if it doesn’t?

Maybe life just goes on. Regardless of what my little nothingness of an existence is doing. Life will go on.